Selalu menjadi salah satu bentuk pelarianku dari kenyataan.. Atau bisa dibilang adalah satu momen di mana aku tau tidak menghadapinya untuk realita..
Tapi dari mimpi itu juga.. terkadang hanya membuatku sulit membedakannya dari fakta.. Saat batas antara mimpi dan realita sangat tipis, sehingga emosi yang terlibat di dalamnya tercampur aduk..
Mimpi.. Bunga tidur.. Atau apapun namanya..
Seakan menjadi tempat diriku berada dalam sebuah permainan di mana aku menjadi tokoh utama.. Di mana aku bisa memerintahkan diriku untuk mengulang sebuah kejadian.. lari dari hal-hal yang mengerikan.. dan menyusun cerita sesuai keinginanku.. Apa itu bisa dibilang sebuah mimpi? Karena aku bisa memegang kontrol darinya..
Mimpi juga.. kadang mengingatkan kita dari sesuatu yang ingin kita lupakan.. Harapan yang bersembunyi.. Keinginan yang terpendam..
Dan mungkin saja.. Mimpi semata-mata adalah sebuah cerminan dari sebuah obsesi yang tak akan mungkin direngkuh.. atau cerminan ketakutan kita yang terbesar...
This dawn when I walk alone in silence,, I hum myself a song,, A sweet lullaby,, a gentle touch,, for everyone who still warm themselves in blankets,, Still, I enjoy the loneliness for myself,,
I looked the sky and can’t find the shiny star I used to see.. “it’s cloudy,” that’s what I said as I know : the same with my mind..
I realize,, that a grace from the heart can’t be last forever… Even that’s my own conclusion I had in mind, I try to understand it.. No one can’t be that perfect, I think..
Even I know that I was acting like a child that time,, I always want to believe that I’ll be given a second chance for it,, To fix it up,, to make it come true,, But the wish never granted after all.. That’s the sin for asking for an angel.. And for the blood that ever shred in these hands,,
For the day I promise to not ever drop a single tear.. for this time,, let me.. Forgive me for wishing a miracle I apologize for being so naïve And I know.. I never be the same again.. I better hide in my own disguise..
I trace the path I ever walk, I looked down and I see a slight circle.. but the bright side is,, I still move on after all.. And I’m asking myself is this what I want.. Until now I can’t answer that question..
For every swing of my grandfather clock.. I know,, time has goes by.. People has changed.. Do I change?
It easier to start drawing on a clean sheet, than the one that already used.. I know that far.. but there’s a part of me that don’t want to erase the trace.. Just let it be like it was.. Because from the darkness, I want to keep the memories.. Maybe.. just maybe.. I won’t see the light again..
And what will wait me ahead? I never know.. But I’ll keep it up with my little steps,, Maybe someday I’ll make it.. To the journey of making me whole..
I just want a time for closing my eyes,, And wake me up when autumn come,,
Or at least.. I’ll wait till the next dawn,,
Inspired from the dream I had last night,, that was the longest dream I ever had!! And this is for the feeling I have in that dream.. Gosh, it’s such a sad story….
Name: mini.me Home: yogyakarta About Me: two girls share the same dream. have different style but still happen to create something fabulous. See my complete profile
